Bah.

By Lee Ann Setzer

This post is about Christmas already, but it’s not my fault.

So, I’m walking through a department store. It’s not Halloween yet, but they have lighted-up Christmas trees and walls of decorations. Appalling, yes. Unusual so far, no.

Here’s what got me: prominently displayed on the endcap were dozens of boxed-up “Charlie Brown Christmas trees.” You know, the one from the movie with a couple little tufts of needles and one big, red, ball? The tree that wasn’t made of tinsel. The “sincere” tree. With a little love and attention, it bloomed into a lovely little tree just right for the Christmas pageant.

The “Charlie Brown Christmas tree” in a box is, of course, artificial, featuring little tufts of plastic needles and a genuine big, red ball. There’s one other difference between this tree and the one in the movie. If you give this product the attention it deserves, slivers of it will reach orbit upon application of appropriate amounts of explosives.

Bah.